Thrashing about under the sheets of my bed I awoke in a cold sweat after experiencing one of the most horrific dreams I've had in quite sometime. Naturally I had to jump right into the Neighborhood to tell my friends and fellow citizens all about it.
I was in my lightweight GPC "It's the smell of $$$ stupid" tee shirt when I turned in last night. I don't sleep in under bottoms as I find them to constricting. I drifted off soon finding myself walking the picket line with our Brothers outside of GPC. As I was walking along with my head down wondering what kind of SCAB would be filling my void I heard what sounded like the voice of angels from on high down near the tracks on Oregon. Sauntering down to check out the commotion imagine my surprise when what I perceived as the voice of angels was actually the Singing Senators. Yes you heard me right. The Singing Senators.
Trent Lott, Jim Jeffords, John Ashcroft, and Larry Craig accompanied by bigbrother and darylmaxen joined arm in arm singing "We Shall Overcome". The vocal strength of the Singing Senators began drawing more and more of our union BROTHERS down to the tracks seeking solidarity and inspiration. After a rousing rendition of KUMBAYA, Senator Jeffords announced they were taking a break for refreshments and would return shortly promising more awe inspiring song. That's when bigbrother stepped from the stage with Larry Craig. "Hey sh?t fer brains" bigbrother bellowed 'Senator Craig needs to use the lavatory, run him down to the park and make it quick! I don't want to keep my audience waiting' bigbrother gloated with wink and a nod to Senator Craig.
Senator Craig piled into my 1988 S-10 and I noticed right off there was a problem. Senator Craig began complaining about there not being enough room in the cab of my S-10. "Sorry Senator Craig I've got the seat back as far as it will go." Pulling into Musser Park I threw the S-10 into park and jumped out to get the Senator's door. Out of the corner of my eye I caught darylmaxen's Chrysler turning into the park. "This way Senator" as I stepped back gesturing towards the men's bathroom. Senator Craig headed directly to the men's stall unbuckling his belt as he went. Figuring "what the heck I'm here I may as well go myself" I enter the stall next to Senator Craig. Phhhhhffffffttttttt, phhhhhhhffffffft, came from Senator Craig's stall followed by an "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh". Then the terror started.
Before I knew it Senator Craig's right foot was tapping against my left foot. No words being exchanged I just ignored it. The tapping against my foot continued and I moved my leg away. Senator Craig then pulled his foot back and ran his right hand under the stall wall snapping his fingers. Quickly I finished my duty and ran out of the stall..BAM.. right into bigbrother and darylmaxen. "What's your hurry?" snarled darylmaxen 'you have to take Senator Craig back up to the rally.' "Uh, sorry I can't. My mom called and needs me to take her to the doctor, besides, there isn't enough room in my truck for Senator Craig's wide stance."
Suddenly, Senator Craig stepped from his stall door extending his hand to bigbrother and darylmaxen who greedily accepted to shake it prior to it being washed. "Oh what do you have there?" asked Senator Craig looking at a jar of Vlassic kosher dill pickles being held in bigbrother's left hand. "Wonderful, now if we only had some black olives" laughed Senator Craig. "Not to worry Senator sir" piped up darylmaxen who magically made a giant can of Great Valu black olives appear at his side. "Great" exclaimed Senator Craig 'lets have a picnic shall we;' as six sets of eyes set upon me. For the next 15 minutes, which seemed like an eternity, bigbrother, darylmaxin, and Senator Craig beat me inside the men's restroom at Musser Park with floppy pickels and pelted me with handfuls of black olives.
I awoke as I said in a cold sweat as their vicious laughter continued to ring through my sub-conscious. Leaping from bed I cautiously checked my bathroom before going in to sit on my thrown to gather my thoughts. Don't get me wrong I'm behind all my fellow brothers in their quest to get a fair and equitable contract to support themselves and their families, but I'm staying away from the Singing Senators and any conservative Republican for that matter.
Our country can change for the better beginning this evening. Tune into the Democratic Convention and keep our BROTHERS who've been locked out of their jobs in your prayers.
God Bless Us All.
