Muscatine

Good Morning Neighbors

Posted in: Muscatine
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  • tommilder
  • Respected Neighbor
  • Muscatine, Ia
  • 461 Posts
  • Respect-O-Meter: Respected Neighbor

Woke up at 4:15am again, this morning.  since it was supposed to start raining at around midnight, went outside to smoke, and check it out.  Appears that it hadn't rained, yet.  It DID start sprinkling at about 4:45am though.  Radio said that it was supposed to rain all day!  It also said, that the low tonight was supposed to be in the 20's?  Does that mean freezing rain and/or ice, for this evening?  I HOPE not.  I'd rather have a foot of snow, than an inch of ice!  Did everybody enjoy the last couple of days of 60's? 

On another note.  Got a question for you folks.  Hopefully, you can give me some ideas.  My 87 year old father fell, for the 3rd time, last evening.  The last time he fell, he broke two vertebrea  in his neck.  My stepmother has been legally blind for the past 20 years.  The are both using walkers.  They live on the 1st floor of an apartment complex, with "visiting nurses" coming 4-5 trimes a week.  He still drives, but, not at night.  They're BOTH stubborn, probably need to be in assited live, but again, won't admit it!  I can't be there for them 24/7, am raising grandkids plus working full time.  ANY suggestions as to what I can/should do?  Tom.

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  • hiroad
  • Respected Neighbor
  • The Hilltop
  • 5055 Posts
  • Respect-O-Meter: Respected Neighbor

Good morning, Tom:

Be careful.  My dad was in a similar situation about 10 years ago (passed away a few years ago).  He was falling down and couldn't drive, but wanted to etc., etc.   Most of the time he was pretty healthy.   But was unpredictable as to falling, etc.    We couldn't, at that time be with him 24 hrs a day.  We had a nurse/housekeeper with him during the daytime hours.   At a certain point in time the social workers at the hospital told us that if we didn't get nursing help 24 hrs a day for him we would be charged with elder abuse.   Neither he, nor we, could afford that at the time.   We (my wife and I were both working full time). had to put him in assisted living, even though he didn't want it.    Be careful who you talk to about the situation.  You might accidently get someone who thinks they know better than you and your family and will use the courts to get their way.


"...told us that if we didn't get nursing help 24 hrs a day for him we would be charged with elder abuse." That is an intimidating threat and should have been pursued/reported as such.

That is a stretch to prove, though...even if charged....at any rate...that can only be charged if elders live with you....unless you are physically/mentally harming them and it can be proven it occurred at their residence.

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  • tommilder
  • Respected Neighbor
  • Muscatine, Ia
  • 461 Posts
  • Respect-O-Meter: Respected Neighbor

I guess that I didn't even consider the legal ramifications to all of this.  I FINALLY, last year, convinced him to sell his motorcycle.  His mind is sharp, his body is weak.  They DO have nursing home insurance.  What it covers, I don't have a clue.  It obviously isn't covering what is goimg on right now.  Neither husband, or wife, can help each other in case of an "in home" accidnet.  I'm just at a loss as to what to do.  I WANT to do what's BEST, for the BOTH of them.  AND, at 61, I've GOT to do what's best for myself, and my family!  Luckily, I work within 5 minutes of where they live, in case of an accident, but, I don't know too many employers that will/would put up with their employee taking time off of work, at the drop of a hat, whenever time off is needed.  I'm not financially able to foot the bill for in home nursing care (24/7).  God, it's a bitch to get old!  Tom.

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