Muscatine

In today's email, I chuckled

Posted in: Muscatine
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If a conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn`t buy one.
If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
 
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone. 

 

 If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.  A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.  

 

   If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
 If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.
 
If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.
 
If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
 
If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don’t like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.

A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)
 
If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.
  
If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed. 
If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he's in labor and then sues. 
  
If a conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh. 
A liberal will delete it because he's "offended".

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  • gta1
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the liberal is offended because the truth sometimes hurts......

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  • darylmaxen
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Jeff

 

I'd say you hit the nail squarely on the head with this one. 

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