Muscatine

I propose a truce in the latest verbal war between our old pal BigBrother and his favorite foil, TruePatriot, or Chosen or whatever you want to call him this month.  Even though TP has followed his old pattern.....show up with a new name, deny old names, be fairly polite the first few weeks, then begin illogical comments, followed by threats and promises to leave the board, followed rapidly by return to the board, followed by the continued verbal jousting, and usually ending with him being banned from the board.  Sound familiar?

My solution is one used by our great Nobel Prize winning President....a beer summit, to be held on nuetral ground, maybe Blue Port Junction bar near the I-280 and 61 intersection.  Good food, nice relaxed atmosphere, and plenty of bikers around to keep order.  Nigel acts as moderator.  Logic provides fact checks.  GTA tends bar and keeps order.  Mallory.....well, nobody can quite figure out what she can do, so she is told to go find the "left-handed screwdriver", and is gone for hours.  Ned shows up to heckle and curse the nice weather. 

It starts out nicely enough, but soon degrades into a finger-pointing, manhood questioning, shouting match.  Within 20 minutes, Ned's left...he's seen enough.  Nigel has given up and is just enjoying the free beer.  Logic is shaking his head.  GTA has called local law enforcement, and Jeff Opinionated is onstage doing a darned fine standup routing.  The bikers have duct-taped TP to the sign out front, and BigBrother is high-fiving anybody who owns a Harley. 

The other scenario is they drink alot, shake hands, and leave in a state of drunken happiness. 

Hey.....it could happen.   I mean, if I just talk about it, I could win that Nobel prize too.  Don't actually have to do anything.

Waiting patiently for my Nobel call.

LOL..ok i agree....anything that ends up with tp duct taped to sign is good for all.....

Hey, thank you ladies and germs.  Welcome to the first BB - TP beer summit.    BB -TP? What, this event being brought to you by Sesame Street?  Like to thank the bar here for hosting us.  You guys ever thought of changing the name of this place to "The Landfill?"  It really a dump.  You guys know how TP got his name?  He's just so squeezably soft.  Its good to be here, at least this gets us out of Muscatine for a while.  Do you know what Muscatine means?  It's an old Miscoutin indian phrase that means "get a life."  Good to see all the bikers here tonight.  You can tell these guys are the Muscatine chapter of the Hell's Angels by all the tricycles parked outside.  Good to see some of the old gang from the neighborhood.  DF is at his usual seat passed out on the floor.  Ned, I like the green thong.  You got balls man, that's all I can say.  But we are here tonight to honor our good friends Big Brother and True Patriot.  These guys have had more words over the years than a Funk and Wagnal dictionary.  These two have thrown more insults at each other than Don Rickles at a dork convention.  But they were able to put all that aside and come and share a beer together. Problem is BB keeps yelling "More Taste" and TP keeps yelling "Less Filling."  So much for dataunte. I understand later we are going to have some entertainment with some duck tape.  It will just quack us up.  Thank you so much, my name is Opie, and my time is up.  Don't forget to tip those cute waitresses, they're the ones with the moustaches.  Good night everybody.

BRAVO!! BRAVO!!! ENCORE!!!